Sunday, June 9, 2013


As I sit, nice and cozy in a hotel room without any plans to drive west at all until maaaayyyyybbbeeee tomorrow, I have a little time to play catch up and let you know what has been going on!

Before the Kansas post, I left you with my wake up in the Miguel's Pizza Camp area...which is where I settled on a camp bench and read my super obscure Red River Gorge book that people made fun of me for posting about on Facebook (you know who you are!) It's amazing how long you can read about rock climbing routes and not get bored in the slightest.  Actually the climbers who write these route descriptions are probably the most creative writers I've ever come upon.  Each little description is dripping with sarcasm and off-handed comments.  Pick one up, they are great reads (dripping with sarcasm).  Actually I really wish the people who wrote these books would write the instructions on how to put together furniture from Ikea, or kids play toys.  It would be so much more entertaining and less frustrating!

Anyways, that book lead me to this place:
This part of the Red River Gorge is on private property owned by the nicest looking couple on a back road.  You actually drive down this dusty old road right past their house.  And man they are awesome at keeping the place nice!  I've never had such comforts while on an approach to a climb since the indoor rock gym!  There were TOILETS!  I mean, the real kind, not the kind that leads down the evil rabbit hole into the wonderland of waste (AKA Port a potties).  RUNNING WATER with SOAP!  It was amazing and I'm not even down to the climbs yet!  On a serious note, it was a huge comfort not only to use a bathroom, but to also see the emergency two way radios and instructions for emergencies posted in key locations.  You just don't get that every where.  When you go to the gorge, make sure you donate a few bucks so it stays that way.

So there I was, hauling my stuff down into the climbing areas, hopping across little rocks through creeks and past the candy cane forest into the LINCOLN TUNNEL! (Elf is one of the greatest movies!)...

*****....this next section is going to be weird if you aren't into rock climbing or know someone who is.  You probably won't understand how I'm about to nerd out about climbing here.  Be patient.  There are other parts to the day...*****

Just walking past some of the formations on my way to the climbing was getting me all excited!  I wish my pictures could be shared, but they're on the other camera...the real one.  Whomp Whomp.  So many colors! So many undulations and cool holds! For people who get their rocks off (yea, I had to do it) scaling cliff faces, I was entering an Eden! Some information: Red River Gorge is comprised of Sandstone mainly.  Do you know WHAT THIS MEANS!  I became SPIDER MAN!!!!!  Sandstone is gritty, and acts like velcro when you put your mitts on it. Suddenly I had transformed into Sharma!  If you don't know who that is, look him up on google images (especially the ladies, trust me).

So I'm doing my Spiderman Sharma thing, and as if I didn't think I was awesome enough I came upon some newbies from Michigan.  These guys were pretty funny. They were making jokes about trusting your rubber (the rubber on your climbing shoes...minds out of the gutter please!). I knew they were cool immediately.  What made them cooler was the fact that they ALSO thought I was Spiderman Sharma. If only they knew the truth, but I wasn't going to stop them from thinking it...


Burned out at the Gorge and decided to do the tourist thing.  I stopped at a sign that pointed out something called the Natural Bridge.  I was pondering deep ponders about what on earth a natural bridge could be...could it be an actual bridge? One that was made naturally?  naaaahhhhhh...couldn't be!  That's impossible!

It was pretty cool watching kind of largish people try to walk through this narrow passage way on the way up to the bridge.  At one point some lady wanted to try to pass me going in the opposite direction.  I'm not super skinny and she was even less so...I don't know what she was thinking was going to happen.

Actually looking at it from below was cooler than looking at it from the top.  BUT watching the people who were afraid of heights on the top of the bridge was even BETTER!


So then I walked around to the next vista to see what it looked like from a little further away...I managed to blind myself with sunbeams and JUST caught the natural bridge in the right corner:

Hiking and Climbing and being Sharma for a day can really take it out of you.  I was very hungry and ready for a slice from Miguels.  I did NOT know they had awesome toppings.  Extra points for Miguel's for letting me experience this Chorizo and Mango salsa pizza.  Two slices please!

And every gas station had these bottles of Ginger Ale, so I went native and had one, in the it looked like I was chugging a beer.  REBEL!

Red River Gorge: I'm out! But, just like Arnold, "I'll be back!"

PS: No complaining about gas.  This stop hurt my heart a little:
(and it wasn't even unleaded, it was the generic brand: inleaded)

1 comment:

  1. Love reading about your adventure.Keep them coming!